Charles Stunning/ Circus Amok
Conversations with a drag queen
Charles Stunning: I definitely say that I promote myself outwardly as very female. I love dressing up and like wearing makeup and doing my hair, obviously, like all of this. Inside, it's sort of different because I I'd rather, watch gory horror movies over rom coms. I was with this drag queen once, and I said, “Man, I really wish I were a drag queen.” And he looked at me and said, "Honey, you are." It made me feel really good. I want to wear the trappings of being a female. I love that. But inside, I just want to be boyish and, like, run around and get dirty.
Dating Life
Charles Stunning: I don't date like a lady dates. I'd say, I'm very easy; Devil may care. Honestly, I just want to hang out with you, have sex and play video games at the end of the day. It's really difficult to feel so blasé about dating when a lot of men expect me to be more like, "I want to be with you for the rest of my life now that we've kissed this one time."
Self-Acceptance
Charles Stunning: In high school, I went through a very long period where I thought I was never going to be really attractive. And then when I got into college, I found that I was able to cast as anginous. When that happened, my costume designer and the director of the show demanded that I lose 5 to 10 pounds for a particular show. I was 18 and I was probably maybe 10, 15 pounds lighter than I am now. That's the thing. I was very slight. I had no boobs whatsoever. And having to do that at such an early age really affected the way I thought about myself. I thought that my shell was only as small as it could be. I ended up using diet pills, working out way too much and eating less than a thousand calories a day. I was really hard on myself all through college to try and be a size 4 when I'm a size 8. Coming here to the City and seeing so many beautiful artists of so many different sizes, you realize that someone's going to want a size 8. The more okay I am with that, the more love will come my way, and the more things will happen for me. I've constantly been working since I've just accepted and loved the body that I'm in.
Dating Life
Charles Stunning: I don't date like a lady dates. I'd say, I'm very easy; Devil may care. Honestly, I just want to hang out with you, have sex and play video games at the end of the day. It's really difficult to feel so blasé about dating when a lot of men expect me to be more like, "I want to be with you for the rest of my life now that we've kissed this one time."
Self-Acceptance
Charles Stunning: In high school, I went through a very long period where I thought I was never going to be really attractive. And then when I got into college, I found that I was able to cast as anginous. When that happened, my costume designer and the director of the show demanded that I lose 5 to 10 pounds for a particular show. I was 18 and I was probably maybe 10, 15 pounds lighter than I am now. That's the thing. I was very slight. I had no boobs whatsoever. And having to do that at such an early age really affected the way I thought about myself. I thought that my shell was only as small as it could be. I ended up using diet pills, working out way too much and eating less than a thousand calories a day. I was really hard on myself all through college to try and be a size 4 when I'm a size 8. Coming here to the City and seeing so many beautiful artists of so many different sizes, you realize that someone's going to want a size 8. The more okay I am with that, the more love will come my way, and the more things will happen for me. I've constantly been working since I've just accepted and loved the body that I'm in.